#Teen Wolf #spoilers #NOPE #NOPE NOPE NOPE #God but he thinks these things about himself #in the darkest corners of his mind these are all his words #these are all his fears and accusations #he thinks he killed his mother #he thinks that if he doesn’t solve this case his dad’s going to drown in liquor #and then Stiles will lose him too #he thinks all of those things and he’s still walking around buying presents and trying to patch up Scott’s relationship #I just #I don’t even #how am I supposed to function when Stiles is this sad?
And people wonder why Stiles’s circle is so small and he’s so protective of his relationship with Scott and why he’ll do anything for him and why he’s still in this world. And people wonder why he protects himself with sarcasm and caustic comments and jokes and why he pines after an unattainable person. It’s because he doesn’t want to lose anyone, he doesn’t want the people he loves to hate him and he doesn’t want to “kill” anyone else. He thinks that being around people will kill them, this is his relationship with love. He’s so desperate for things to be okay that he shoves everything down deep.
But the truth is is that Stiles didn’t have anything to do with his mom’s death, of course he didn’t. And that his dad loves him more than anything and that Scott would do anything for him and that tons of people would love to be in Stiles’s circle if only he would acknowledge them (Erica) or trust him.
And what’s great is that Stiles is such a good judge of character (MATT) and has insight into people (EVERYONE) and he could be such a light and SPARK in people’s lives. If he would only open up.
Pay attention to the bolded sentences, in particular.
Stiles and Derek have EXACTLY the same issues with love. They came by them differently, but damn, those are the exact same issues. They both think they kill the people they love. That loving people will only put those people in danger. Better to stay away, to stay fortified with sarcasm (in Stiles’s case) and brute force (in Derek’s). Better not to love anyone, at all, other than the people they have no choice but to love.
The thing with Derek is, most fans think he’s got issues with trusting other people, thanks to Kate, but the person he really can’t trust is himself. He can’t trust himself not to hurt the people he loves - worse, even kill them.
He never really hated Kate, you see.
He hated himself.
If he’d hated Kate more than he hated himself, he’d have pulled a Peter and would’ve gone for the good ol’ fashioned vengeful killing. But he didn’t. He couldn’t. Arguably, her betrayal of him was even more punishable, combined with the murder of his family, but he… couldn’t. Hurt her. He just couldn’t. Derek isn’t capable of killing someone he loves, or once loved. He isn’t - he isn’t capable of that.
And yet, ironically, that’s exactly the sort of person he thinks he is - a selfish, stupid bastard that killed his entire family because of a callous, childish infatuation with a beautiful girl. It’s not the girl he blames the most for it all; it’s himself.
Just like Stiles blames himself. For everything. The loss of his mother. His father getting fired. He hurts the people he loves. He’s sure of it.
Man, these two.
Exactly the same issues.
I can’t decide if this makes me want them to get together even more, so that they can heal each other by being the only two people that can understand each other, or if it makes me torturously worried that they’ll fuck each other up even more.
(Also: This fandom is awesome and all the meta it produces is awesome.)
Reblogging for the commentary. This fandom’s shippy meta is destroying me. /o\